Miami Trouble

South Beach features some of the best entertainment in the world. And the arrival of the Pro Bowl and Super Bowl will bring yet another level to an already explosive party area.

Bonehead moves are not just a forte of Brett Favre; they are also a cliché when it comes to NFL commish Roger Goodell.

1. Let’s put the Pro Bowl a week before the Super Bowl so the best players in the league that play on the best 2 teams can’t play. Awesome.

2. Let’s put the Pro Bowl and Super Bowl in back-to-back weeks in Miami. Not to worry; time off, NFL players and celebrity parties on South Beach won’t lead to any trouble.

NFL players can’t seem to stay out of trouble as is. There are just some things you don’t do; you don’t put your mother-in-law sleep on your sleeper sofa and you don’t give NFL players the opportunity to screw up.

We will see Murphy’s Law in action the next 2 weeks.

No 'Love' Down Under

Where did all the diehard tennis fans go? Are they all on vacation in Norway?

James Blake had an epic battle with Juan Del Potro, who won the 2009 US Open versus clean shaven Roger Federer, and they get no love. It was only 10-8 in the 5^th set, but it was about as old news as steroids are to Mark McGwire.

For the first time since 2003 do a duo of Americans have a shot at winning both the men’s and women’s singles championships. But people are more worried about the future of a jerkless American Idol and the drama of a bunch of dweebs on a Shore in Jersey. Where are our principles?

It may not be Wimbledon or Rowland Garros but it is the first major of the year. Possibly 2 of the greatest players of all-time are in contention, and still at their prime nonetheless. With 10 legitimate contenders, it is up for grabs on who is going to win. This is the early 90’s NBA for the tennis world.

What’s better than waking up at 3 AM to watch great tennis? Crickey, NOTHING!

Onside is Offside

What is worse than Manu Ginobili flops? More outrageous than John Daly on casual Friday? That is the NFL onside rules.

The kicking team is not allowed to have more than 5 players on one side of the kicker because it was an injury prone formation. That may be so but it was takes away all the creativity of the game. It’s like taking ‘Tickle-Me-Pink’ out of the Crayola Big Box.

Promoters of the onside kick are enraged, since it has been proven to be an effective way to gain the ball even though it may be seem high in risk/reward. Kicker’s abilities should be put to good use and be taken in as a key asset of the team rather than a burden in the last seconds of the game.

As the NFL remains in the past, the imagination of the league will go stagnant and a beautiful part of the game will disappear.

Rachel the Great

There is one home run by an athlete using steroids that nobody can get mad about. That is Rachel Alexander winning the Horse of the Year.

This filly was hyped beyond all belief and yet surpassed many expectations. She stole everything, including jockey Calvin Borel, except the roses from the winner of the Kentucky Derby to win the last prestigious race of the year in the Preakness.

Although she was the next best thing since Sea Busicut (the movie) in horse racing she did have competition; from another filly nonetheless. The horse formally known as Zenyatta was nipping at her heals til the very end. She had a great year. Zenyatta won the Belmont Stakes and came in 2^nd in Female Athlete of the Year, only losing to Serena Williams. Now that’s impressive.

With the atrocities of the last few years in horse racing it is a fine sight to see the class come back into this hallowed sport.

Purdue Piece

Matt Painter is no Michelangelo, even though his name might suggest otherwise.

The Purdue Boilermakers lost their third game in a row faster than a Chia Pet grows an afro. The once touted #6 team in the nation looked like they were on a sure fire path to Indianapolis and there first Final Four appearance in 30 years until this unfortunate streak.

This was sure to be their year; the maturation of E’Twaun Moore and Robbie Hummel would catapult the West Lafayette team to the promise land. Their style of play will keep them in most all games, along with many scrappy role players that intertwine better than a finely woven basket.

Once they get back on track, and they will get back on it, only time will tell how good this team could really be. They have leadership, scoring, toughness, experience; all the components needed in March.

With some precise brush strokes Matt Painter could turn this team into a masterpiece.

8 Crashing the Dance

For the first time in the history of college basketball there could be 8 teams from the same conference playing in March. And no, this conference is not the Big East. . . It’s the Big XII.

Eight Big XII teams received votes for the top 25. And ALL four teams that didn’t receive votes played with or beat a team from the Big XII that received a vote. Colorado beat #22 Baylor, Oklahoma beat Oklahoma State, Iowa State almost beat #1 Texas and Nebraska almost beat #3 Kansas. Although one team may not stand out, Texas is closest to being in a league of their own, they are all solid.

Eight teams getting into the tournament is unheard of, imagine if the Big XII gets 10 in. And that is a real possibility.

So You Think You Can Coach?

In the final timeout of the game by the Cleveland Cavaliers against the Denver Nuggets an assistant coach was drawing up a play while head coach Mike Brown stood right behind him in awe of what he would describe as beautiful penmanship.

This epic moment just reinforced the thought that Mike Brown is the worst coach in the NBA.

Mike Brown, the Head Coach of the Cleveland Cavaliers, has no right being on the sideline of an NBA court. He has this one guy, I don’t know if you’ve ever heard of him. . . Lebron James. Giving him credit for the success of the Cavs is like saying Horseradish smells good. And that ain’t right.

When Mr. James arrived in Cleveland in 2003 he caused an 18 game turnaround in one year. Mike Brown increased their wins by only 8. And when in 2008 when Mike Brown won the NBA Coach of the year do you think it had anything to do with this Lebron character winning the MVP?

But there is one thing Coach Brown can do, and that is criticizing the refs. And he can sure do it with the best of them; his billfold proves that.

So please, whatever you do, give credit where credit is due. King James, NOT Jester Brown.

BCS Title: Parade of Roses?

Let’s get some things straight from last night’s National Title Game between Alabama and Texas:

1. The fake punt on the first drive of the game for Alabama was not a direct call from Saban. It was more of an audible than anything. Texas put 9 men on the line, leaving the receiver closest to the Alabama sideline uncovered. Whether it was a check by Saban, or a read by PJ Fitzgerald; both seeing an easy opportunity to steal a first down and momentum; it was just poorly executed and both would do it again if they had the chance.

2. Garrett Gilbert is going to be nasty. He is a true freshman. .Who had to come in after the All-American, All-Everything Colt McCoy went down with injury. . In the BCS National Championship Game. . Against the Steam Rolling Tide and the number one defense in the land in Alabama. He was nervous at first, but who wouldn’t be, Woody Page would have even been left speechless in that situation. But once he settled down, he was great. He was playing with only one receiver, Jordan Shipley, and no legitimate running back. Watch out. . like next year. . cause he’s going to be goooood.

3. Nick Saban may be the best recruiter in the nation, and as smooth Matthew McConaughey on a first date but I’m not happy with the way he scored that touchdown at the end of the game. Granted he did run it in, but what else had they done all night. McElroy only threw the ball 12 times the whole night. And wouldn’t you want to use Victory Formation, to win the National Title. They did get the ball back and kneel on it, but it would have been sweeter and more respectful if you did it earlier.

The game didn’t live up the hype that most people expected. This had to do with McCoy getting hurt, a couple bonehead play calls and just the overall play from both teams. But as Lou Holtz said in his pregame speech, “You don’t have to be the best team in the Nation, just the best team on the field today.”And Alabama did just that. Congrats.

Zorn with Potential

Watch out for . . . Jim Zorn?

Yes I did say that right; Jim Zorn, former head coach of the Washington Redskins, should be on the hot list for many a team.

He was obviously way in over his head being the Head Coach for a Dan Snyder owned team whose head coaches’ heads are gone faster than the guillotine. Joe Gibbs, a Hall of Fame coach who had a ton of success with the same team in the 90’s, got the boot after only 3 years. Asking a coach nowadays to turn a mediocre team, at best, around in 2 years is pure ludicrous.

Zorn was an outstanding quarterback, for his size and ability, in his era and has nearly an unlimited amount of information he can give to an up and coming quarterback in this league. A low price-tag and his mystic factor gone, taking a chance on Zorn would be like betting on the Yankees, well anyone, to beat the Nationals.

Zorn turned Jason Campbell; you know. . The guy who handed the ball off to Cadillac Williams, Ronnie Brown and Clinton Portis; into a solid, West-Coast quarterback.

Give Jim Zorn a young quarterback, with potential, to groom and watch out for him in the Pro Bowl a few years down the road.

Iowa Ifs

“We’re number one” Said Stanzi after his Iowa Hawkeyes team took down the Georgia Tech Yellow Jackets in the 2010 Orange Bowl.

He happened to be talking about the Nation that he loved in front of national television and the rest of Hawkeye nation. But he should have been talking about his team with the rest of college football eating their dust.

It is unfortunate that Iowa did not get the chance to compete for the National Title due to an unfortunate injury by their star quarterback and leader Ricky Stanzi.

Their only 2 losses of the year came against Northwestern, the game where Stanzi went down with injury, and the next week in Columbus against a #11(at the time) ranked Ohio State team, in OT nonetheless. Without these 2 losses their resume is about as solid as, well the Iowa’s defense. They beat Wisconsin IN Madison and also beat, then #5, Penn State IN Happy Valley prior to the injury.

If only we could call Stanzi ‘Slick Rick’ and he could have broken that one tackle against Northwestern we might be looking at an Iowa-Alabama matchup in Pasadena duking it out in a good old fashioned slugfest.

Bronco's Success

This year is a success in my book.

The Denver Broncos owner Pat Bowlen stabbed one of the greatest, unrecognized coaches directly between the shoulder blades in Mike Shanahan and brought in Belichicks Mini-Me with Josh McDaniels.

Little boy blue had had enough with a star in Jay Cutler and shipped him off the Windy City for a guy who got beat out by Rex Grossman, who threw 20 INTs in one year, and three other just plain awful quarterbacks in Kyle ‘Grizzly’ Orton.

Then the preseason came; where the Broncos lost the first 2 games to the 49ers and Seahawks who have 8 and 5 wins respectably.

The near future of the Broncos was about as bleak as a hot dog on a plate in front of Joey Chesnut.

Finally the season started and the Broncos came out firing on all cylinders winning the first 6 games. People in the Mile High City were jumping on the bandwagon faster than a jack rabbit in a prairie fire.

Then it took a turn for the worse, or actually the one the TomTom had been looking for the whole time; right down Miserable Lane. The Broncos finish the season 8-8 losing its last 4 games and 8 of their last 10.

If someone was going to tell me that the Denver Broncos would win 4 games this year I would have sent them to the psych ward on account of them committing Harry Caray. So I’ll take 8.